What is Love?

When I was in college, I asked all my friends to define love. I then sent out all the responses on Valentine's Day as my present to them. I just found this email, and thought it was awesome. I have no idea who answered these (I wish I would have kept the names next to them), but I thought the responses were pretty profound for a bunch of 18 year olds...

What is your definition of love?

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It is clearly stated in the Bible. “Love is patient, love is kind...” My little add-on is love is when even if you are angry at a person, you still want to be in their presence. When you are sad, when you are happy, when the greatest thing in the world has happened to you, when your dog dies, when you are sick...you want this person to share it all with you. You feel ultimately happy and satisfied just thinking of this person, and when it’s true love, they feel the same way.

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I think Jesus is the purest definition of love. There are many levels of love. To love someone you see Jesus in them. This is not to be confused with lust. O happy race of men, if love, which rules heaven, rule your minds.

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Well, after giving it some thought, I realized that love is no more than a zero score in tennis. But hey, let me guess that you wanted a different definition. Love is a deep affection for someone, be it sexual, or platonic. Love can be a passion, i.e. Braveheart had the passion = Braveheart had the love. Or maybe in a more physiological sense, love is a need. It is within human nature, mammal nature to love and be loved. Imagine the kitten who is left out of the litter, the kitten ignored by it’s mother. That kitten dies. Superimpose that idea on children, toddlers. The one ignored by the parents, the one with no friends, will cry its little life away and drown within its own tears. That should give you and idea of what love really is. There’s more to it than the generally accepted popular definition.

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My definition would be the feeling you get when you think about spending the rest of your life with somebody and you don’t even mind...its the feeling that makes you go out of your way to do little things just to make the person you love happy.

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I don’t really have an answer to what love is. I know that I love *** because I respect everything he does and is. Does that help at all?

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I think love is something that is shared between two people, and there are no boundaries. You have fun together and can confide in each other, you can fight well, but make up even better. You share a bond that to everyone else is indescribable.

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This is a very good question. Love can be acknowledged by different people at varying stages of a relationship. It is very important to realize that no one completely understands love or what love really is. I personally have the very unpopular belief that love is as much of a verb as an emotion. It is very easy to fall in love with someone, but to actively love someone is very special, and requires more than just some random hormones working in your body.

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Wow, you sure know how to ask them you know? Let me tell you from the start that my knowledge of love is purely Biblical. First of all, you can start by reading 1 Corinthians 13. It defines what love is supposed to be and gives us a guideline as Christians on how to discern it. The entire book of the Song of Songs is an excellent guide to relationships and how they are supposed to be.

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Since I have never been in “love,” I am really not the best person to ask. Even though I have no personal experience, I have always believed that love is something that people do and not what people are in. You can only love another person for everything that they represent. All the goo and all the bad, and if that isn’t possible, then love between those two people isn’t possible.

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Love is whatever you make of it. It can be as simple as a midnight hookup, or as meaningful as marriage. Some people find love in different ways. For me, I know that I love my girlfriend. But only recently have I really fallen in love with her. We've dated for two years, and I’ve always felt "love" when I was with her, but now it's more...real. I don't know it...I feel it. For me, truly being in love with **** means being able to not see her for several days and feel OK with myself. It means being able to disagree with her and not let it ruin our relationship. Being in love means being mature and the capability to be comfortable by yourself.

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Love is when without thinking twice, you give someone your heart and your soul, and you still think they deserve more.

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Love can't be defined. The word Love is just one of mankind's attempts
to exert some control over something that can't, and won't, be
controlled. The way I see it, the word Love is like the word God. It
means something different to everyone, but it's used to represent
something immensely powerful and beyond our complete comprehension.

But, just to show that I don't think that I'm better then the whole of
mankind, I'll take my shot at giving a meaning to the word.

Love is the shortness of breath after you kiss that special someone,
it's the quickening of your heart when that same person walks in the
room. It's the involuntary response of reaching for that person's hand
when, although you're not looking at each other and have no idea where
that person really is, you sense that they're near. It's the person
that you want to give the world to. It's the person that you want to be
everything for. It's the one person that you would change for. Because
they never asked you too.

Love is the what fills the hole in you that you've had your entire life,
but that you didn't realize existed until the one person who can fill it
appears.

That's what Love is.

***
Awfully hard question...
Generic Answer:
Friendship: A general feeling of intimacy and compassion towards one another...
Relationships: An undying need for that other person in all aspects...

"The Phone Bill" -- Written when I was 17 in 1996

If there is one thing in the world that I hate the most, it would have to be the phone bill. I hate the anticipation of getting it, I hate the punishment I receive after getting it, and I hate the mere fact that it even exists. Personally, I think a mean old executive in a dark, gloomy office one day, devised the idea of a phone bill just so at least one week of every month would be extracted from every single teenager's life.

Every month, it's the same routine... As my parents are driving me home from school, they stop at the mailbox to innocently get the mail. Little do they know that this minor action sends their teenager who is sitting in the back seat, into sheer and utter terror. As they open the door to the mailbox, the creaking of the hinge sounds as if someone is scratching their fingernails onto a chalkboard. The sound gets louder and louder until my parents pull out the mail and slam the door shut, which now leaves a hollow echo in my mind. Before they drive up the driveway, they sit in the car slowly sorting through the mail, one by one. I can hear my father now,

"Ah, Kathy... another mission wants money, oh boy- the credit card bill, hey! Ed here says I'm a millionaire..."

Just then, as if Satan himself had visited my car at the bottom of that long driveway-- I see it. It's the big envelope about eight inches by six. It's the... (gulp)... phone bill. Immediately, my stomach soars up to my throat and I can taste my peanut butter and jelly sandwich that I had for lunch. Thoughts of those long nights spent on the phone that all seemed so important at the time, now are just instant regret in my mind. My father sees it, smiles his evil grin and says,

"Oh look, sweetie, YOUR phone bill came."

Those words make me cringe. Why must he say, YOUR phone bill? I mean, he could at least say, THE phone bill... but no. My father has to drill it into my skull that every month I am costing the family precious hard earned money by making selfish calls to friends. I hate it.

As the car slowly goes up the driveway, I feel as if I'm in a funeral procession... except that it's MY funeral. The car stops. I get out. As I enter my house, instead of running to the refrigerator and eating the usual snack, I run to my room, and ironically, yes. I make a phone call. I make this call because it is the last one I will make until I am off groundation. This call is much like the one call you get from jail. It is my last chance to communicate to the real world.

Then I hear, "YOUNG LADY!!! GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!"

It had happened. They had opened the (gulp)... phone bill. I slink down the stairs ever so slowly and manage to put an, "I-Love-You-Mom-And-Dad-Ever-So-Much-And-I-Have-Never-Heard-Of-A-Phone-In-My-Life" look on my face. It doesn't work.

"You made $80.00 worth of phone calls in one month young lady! What on EARTH (they like to emphasize earth a lot) were you thinking?! How are we supposed to pay for this?! You are grounded for one month!"

Then I usually say OK, and go to my room. I sit in the silence for ten minutes or so, and do my homework. The next day however, the temptation is so great that I reach over, grab the phone, and dial those forbidden eleven digits. Then a month goes by... we are driving home from school, and we stop to get the mail...

I hate phone bills.

The Roadhouse

I've been listening to The Roadhouse station on Sirius a lot lately. It's basically old country music, all the time. I have been getting quite a chuckle at some of the songs and their lyrics. It inspired me to do a web search to see if other people thought these song titles and lyrics were funny as well, and I seemed to have hit a goldmine! One of the funnier compiled lists that I found is below.

1. Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth Cause I'm Kissing You Good-bye.

2. I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself or Go Bowling.

3. If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You.

4. I Sold A Car To A Guy Who Stole My Girl, But It Don't Run So We're Even.

5. Mama Get A Hammer (There's A Fly On Daddy's Head).

6. If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me.

7. She's Actin' Single and I'm Drinkin' Doubles.

8. How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away.

9. I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You.

10. I Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well.

11. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better.

12. I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win.

13. I'll Marry You Tomorrow, But Let's Honeymoon Tonight.

14. I'm So Miserable Without You; It's Like Having You Here.

15. I've Got Tears In My Ears From Lying On My Back Cryin' Over You.

16. If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I'd Be Out By Now.

17. My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love You.

18. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend and I Sure Do Miss Him.

19. Please Bypass My Heart.

20. She Got The Ring and I Got The Finger.

21. You Done Tore Out My Heart and Stomped That Sucker Flat.

22. You're the Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly.

23. Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure.

24. She's Looking Better After Every Beer.

25. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With An Ugly Woman, But I Sure Woke Up With a Few.

Blessings.

I have been very very blessed to have come in contact with a select few friendly, influential, intelligent, and overall wonderful people throughout my short 30 years here on Earth. These people are currently scattered all over the country and these are the type of people that I can email or call once or twice a year and talk to them for hours like nothing has changed.

They are the friends that challenge me to think, they are the friends that aren't afraid to tell me when I am full of shit, and they are the friends that I know I can trust and love unconditionally. They are also a diverse lot -- some with similar beliefs and some with the complete opposite. But the one thing we seem to all have in common is a love for knowledge, philosophy, humor, banter, analysis and truth. If you are one of these people, you know who you are.

So, thank you. Thank you for inspiring me and enriching my life - your friendships have not gone unnoticed or unappreciated. And even though I am hug-phobic, I am giving you all a huge virtual hug right now.

Love,
Michelle, Mitch, Mitcherelle, Chihuahua, Michey, Shell, MiJoy

Things I Can't Do

I was asked recently, "Michelle, what can't you do?" I thought this was a really interesting question because most of the time people want to talk about and are proud of what they CAN do. So I thought I'd try and list some things I can't do.

• I can't dance. This was confirmed by a coworker the other day when he told me I can't. I said "How did you know that?" He responded with, "I can just tell by the way you carry yourself." Gee, thanks. I carry myself like a person with no rhythm apparently.
• I can't lie. I suck at it. It is very very difficult for me to lie. And when I do, the Catholic guilt takes over and I end up confessing.
• I can't play sports. Never could. I am terribly athletically retarded. I am particularly bad at: basketball, soccer, baseball, tennis, swimming (I can barely stay afloat), football, volleyball and running. The few sports I can do are floor hockey, field hockey (I did play that in high school), water skiing, snow skiing, and badminton. If you consider those sports.
• I can't drive a stick shift.
• I can't park (normal or parallel).
• I can't sing.
• I can barely whistle.
• I can't speak a different language.
• I can't spell.
• I can't do math. I'm awesome at logic, but I suck at math.
• I can't program computers. I always wished I could, because I love to program databases. I always wished I could write programs that would run my databases.
• I can't eat oranges. I know a lot of people are thinking "that's not a can't, that's a won't." But no, it's true. I CAN'T eat oranges. If I do, I vomit. I blame my mother.
• I can't paint. I really wish I could. I think I will take a class someday.
• I can't play the piano. I started to teach myself about 2 years ago, but didn't get that far.
• I can't tolerate people hating me. Even if I hate them, for some reason I feel compelled to make them like me. This has caused a lot of problems in my life and is something I need to get over.
• I can't process audio very well. I'm a visual learner. I like to watch movies with the subtitles on and I try to read song lyrics so I can truly understand the meaning behind things. I think this has something to do with my English background.
• I can't do carpentry. I love fixing things, and I really wish I knew how to build things. I would definitely take a class if I could.
• I can't fold paper. I always mess it up. I can never get the corners to be just right.
• I can't do a cartwheel, round over or walk on my hands. I used to be so jealous of my friends that could do that.
• I can't juggle. Yes, I've tried several times.
• I can't crochet or knit.
• I can't wake up in the mornings. I am a night person.
• I can't ride a horse, even though we owned them most of my childhood.
• I can't understand people with thick accents. I always feel sorry for these people, especially if they are employees at my company because I am constantly asking them to repeat or spell words. I think this has to do with the fact that I lack the ability to process audio.
• I can't french braid my own hair.
• I can't vote for a Democrat. :)
• I can't let an email sit unanswered. If I get an email at work, I answer it the minute I see it. If I don't answer, it means I haven't seen it. I've had complaints from employees because I will be sitting there talking to them and will drop everything to answer an email that comes in. I think it is because I like to get things off my plate as soon as possible, because if I let it sit there, it will get ignored. I probably answer over 100 emails a day and frequently get compliments about my responsiveness. Little do they know it's a horrible OCD complex!
• I can't raise just one eyebrow or touch my tongue to my nose. I can, however, tie a cherry stem into a knot inside my mouth.
• I can't climb the rope in gym class.
• I can't do a pull up.
• I can't play Dance Dance Revolution but I'm pretty darn good at Guitar Hero.
• I can't ever have the last word when it comes to banter with Sarah.
  

Recycle Bank

I just found out that Recycle Bank is coming to South Riding in a few months! Pretty cool stuff!

This is Awesome.

So cool.

Thanks Anyway, Congressman Wolf

Gee darn. My hopes of selling these to pay for our new shower are now dashed.

Dear Friend,

Thank you for contacting my office regarding tickets to the Inaugural Ceremony of President-elect Barack Obama. Due to overwhelming interest in the 56th Inaugural Ceremony and the very low number of tickets (198) allocated to each congressional office by the Joint Congressional Committee on Inaugural Ceremonies, I regretfully inform you that we will be unable to fulfill your request for tickets to the ceremony.

While a ticket is required for the area on the National Mall designated for the swearing-in ceremony, other areas of the mall are open to the public and do not require tickets. Large video screens will be placed along the mall to view the event. There also are other opportunities, such as the Inaugural parade and various Inaugural balls, taking place and additional information for those events are available through the Presidential Joint Inaugural Committee’s Web site at inaugural.senate.gov. Unfortunately, House and Senate offices do not receive any distribution of tickets to these events.

Please do not hesitate to contact my office at any time if I may be of assistance to you in any way.

Best wishes.

Merry Christmas

Tip tap on the window,
the frost raps
as the wind announces
the induction of winter.
Drops of fluffy white
float down the sky like wisps
of manna--
nourishing our souls,
reminding us that
life, like the flakes, is ephemeral  
and distinct.
The world is preparing
to be re-born, nature  
laboring under a
blanket of frost.  
With one last push  
towards the new year,
the Son is crowned  
and exhales--
warming us for eternity.  
    
Edited from a past poem, L'Hiver

:)

Time Machine

I was asked to attend my friend's daughter's 9th birthday party tonight at the Skate-N-Fun Zone in Manassas.  

When I was 9, this place was called the "Skate Ranch" and it was THE place to be.  I can remember begging my Mom to drop me off there so I could meet up with friends and each time she would tell me, "No, it is too dangerous there -- you will get kidnapped!"  On a few occasions, instead of dropping me off, she would take me there on Thursdays after school (Thursdays were 1:30 early dismissals back then) and I would skate for a few hours under her watchful eye with my best friend of the week listening to Cindy Lauper and Madonna songs.

Tonight when I walked in, I couldn't believe how much the place had NOT changed.  Everything was pretty much the same, except instead of the brown and orange paint and carpeting, everything was painted in 90's neon colors with black carpet.  And instead of Madonna playing, it was Britney.

Since I was there purely as a guest, I took the opportunity to bring my Rollerblades and take a ride back in time on the still slick wooden rink.  After about 2 times around, I heard my name being called from my 9 year old neighbor.

"Michelle!  Can you help Ragan put on her skates?"

I rolled over to a 6 year old tow headed little girl who was sitting on the ground trying with all her might to get those cinder blocks with wheels onto her feet.  While I was lacing her up, her blue eyes looked up at me and she said all excited, "I've never been skating before!"

This caused me to instantly calculate in my brain the following:  If her parents aren't around to help her with her laces, who the heck is going to teach her how to skate?!  

So I very calmly asked, "Ragan, is your Mommy here?"

And she goes, "No, she dropped me off.  My big sister is here, but she doesn't know how to skate either!"

At that, I turned around and noticed another blue-eyed, blond haired angelic face stumbling and clunking her way around the rink.  With the laces tied, I resigned myself to the fact that I would be this child's new tutor and I promptly grabbed her hand and said, "Let's start out slow, k?"

My lord.  I never knew how impossible it would be to teach a kid to roller skate.  Since I had not roller bladed in two years, I was pretty wobbly myself and I had this 40 pound slippery piece of linguine attached to my hand that was clinging to me as if her life depended on it!

After about 4 trips around the rink of Ragan pulling and slipping and falling -- she looked up at me beaming and goes, "I think I'm getting better!"  Bless her heart.  After another trip around, I escorted her over the "wall of safety" and instructed her to hold onto it and I would be back for her.  Turns out, letting her go was the best thing I could have done.  She mustered up a lot of confidence after that and managed to skate the rest of the time by herself -- granted she was more stumbling around than rolling, but at least she was doing that on her own.  I admired her for that -- I am not sure I would have been able to have a total stranger teach me to rollerskate at that age without my parents around.

At the end of the party, she came up to me and said, "What's your name?"  I told her it was Michelle.  She just looked at me and said, "Hi."  Too cute.  I told her she did really well skating and she just radiated a huge smile.

It was a fun time overall -- I'm glad I went.  And since I am 29 and 11.5/12ths right now and NOT 30, I figured I could still get away with skating with a bunch of 9 year olds and still have fun.